


the distance between a house and a car.

by kalopseia



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Post-Apocalypse, Angst, Inspired by a Mitski Song, Lowercase, M/M, as all of the jukebox pieces are this round, how do I tag things, i just love vulnerability, take that as you will LOL, theyre going home
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-13 10:36:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29774910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kalopseia/pseuds/kalopseia
Summary: (hint: the distance is actually not that long.)haikyuu writer jukebox - round 1: mitski - i want youkoushi and daichi take a trip back to the house they once shared together.
Relationships: Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi
Comments: 9
Kudos: 8
Collections: Haikyuu Writer Jukebox Round One - Mitski





	the distance between a house and a car.

**Author's Note:**

> this took a wildly different turn from my original idea but i just felt more comfy w the apocalypse setting... somehow...  
> i kinda went crazy here bc i have never finished an actual fic in my entire life but i was feeling adventurous today and i was also very sick and tired of creating apoc fics for every single fandom i enter and not finishing them
> 
> anyway pls be gentle on me this is baby's first published fic
> 
> cw // apocalypse, some end of the world talk??

**[200 KM UNTIL DESTINATION]**

in the pitch-blackness of the early morning, a lone car swerves erratically on a two-way road. a single headlight emits the only source of illumination in at least a 1000 km radius.

in the driver’s seat is a young man: cold, starving, running-on-nearly-no-sleep sugawara koushi. going 100 on a 60, in the middle of the end of the world.

riding shotgun is his partner-in-crime: cold, starving, running-on-at-least-four-hours-of-sleep sawamura daichi, absolutely crossed that suga is driving in this state, but lacks the strength to give him an earful at the moment. daichi insisted many times that he’d drive, but given the fact that daichi sustained quite the injury trying to get the car in the first place, suga condemned him to the passenger seat.

“just don’t fucking crash,” daichi groans, fingers massaging his temples.

“yeah, yeah, i’ve got this. we’ll be _fiiine,_ ” suga replies half-heartedly.

“whatever you say…” the younger man leans back, leaving whatever happens from here on out to the higher power. “as long as you can see in front of y—”

a strong veer to the side prompts daichi to lean in and jerk the wheel to the left, getting back into the lane. their hands graze each other’s as daichi slumps back into his chair, a small breath getting knocked out of him. suga, not batting an eye, utters a quiet “sorry.”

daichi tries so hard to hold the two of them together, to provide some sort of stability, like he used to. so naturally, suga can’t help but feel bad for causing him trouble all the time; even if daichi never labeled him as a burden, it was hard not to believe he was. he wanted to be useful, or make it up to him somehow. after all, daichi was the last remaining voice of reason for koushi. in truth, suga saw him as the only thing keeping him from sinking into the depths of giving up. many times did the air get so thick, so stifling that he could suffocate. but such was the survivor experience. at least he could breathe. many others could no longer.

what a sobering thought.

daichi sighs. “it’s alright. just focus, kou. i think we’re almost there.”

suga sucks in a cold breath. 

“you really think we’re close?”  
“we’ll know for sure once day breaks.”

\---

they didn’t know where they were running to, at first. at first, the challenge was getting to the tunnel, having no end in mind. only one step at a time. that was their go-to strategy: earning one point at a time.

now, months of aimless nomadity later, they could see the light at the end. they had a plan to return to a place they never thought they’d see again: their home. if they were going to die somewhere, it sure as hell wouldn't be in the middle of nowhere.

the journey wouldn’t be easy to make; they’d need a working car, gas, something to protect themselves; but a promise made many months ago proved reason enough to drive the 200 km trip back. the timing of this whole apocalypse thing couldn’t be any worse. just when they thought they could settle down…!! 

but that’s enough of that _“why did it have to turn out this way?”_ crap. suga knows there’s no good answer for that, and he wouldn’t live long enough to hear it anyway.

now, there is a road ahead that stretches on and on. weathered and eroded, worn with time, it serves one given purpose: to measure the distance between their house and the car.

**[112 KM UNTIL DESTINATION]**

suga remembers a day where the leaves fell off their branches, drifting onto the wet ground; when the air blew colder—an indication of the coming winter. having the day off, daichi invited suga out for a morning jog, and they ended up taking the scenic route to enjoy the last taste of autumn they’ll ever get.

“the weather’s great, don’t you think? maybe we should’ve gotten the rest of the team to come with us!” suga huffed between pants.

“i’ll let them have their break.” daichi caught up to suga as he said that. “they deserve it, after all.”

“that better not mean that you don’t deserve a break as well.”

“scolding me this early in the morning? if i need a break, then you’d better give me one!” daichi teased.

suga swiftly delivered a playful punch to daichi’s arm. “knock it off! i’m just saying!”

they chuckled.

“i’ll take a break later. i just needed the fresh air.”  
“fair enough, capt.”

the two continued their jog and slowed down when they got to the top of a steep incline. the view overlooked the town in its entirety.

the sun had just begun its ascension, and the tangy oranges and reds melted together in the sky. every building basked in the warmth of the hues.

daichi stood in silence, taking in the scenery. it wasn’t every day that he could get a taste of this peace and serenity; what with his chaotic household and equally chaotic teammates alike. it was a nice sensation that danced on the tip of his tongue. suga, understanding, remained quiet as well. and so they admired the sunrise above the mountains together.

a few moments passed.

“suga?”  
“mm?”

“i…”

daichi bit his cheek. suga raised an eyebrow.

“wanted to... ask you something…”

“dai, you’re bright red. you look like you’re about to pass out.”  
“can you listen to me first?!”  
“haha, sorry!” 

the smile on suga’s face only grew larger at his flusteredness. he already knew exactly what daichi was going to ask. asahi _might’ve_ spoiled the surprise for him a little the last time they talked.

“can- will… um…will you… be…”  
“take your time, captain!”  
“suga!”

the vice apologized again, still giggling.

“i’m not going to say it now.”  
“ _nooooo!!_ you can’t do that! daichi, say it! tell me!”  
“nope, you’re not going to take it seriously.”  
“i will!! _i will!”_

daichi’s face glowed pink with frustrated embarrassment as he tried to find the right words to say. with an averted gaze, he finally muttered, “i...like you.”

“come on, you’re not even gonna look at me when you say it?”  
“you know what, nevermind. i’m taking it back,” daichi announced in his signature stern voice. but when he looked back at suga, his expression softened.

suga was grinning, as big as his mouth could stretch. “i love you too.”

before daichi could snag the opportunity to say anything else, suga pulled the captain into a tender embrace and buried his head into the crook of his neck. the last thing he remembered from that day was the lingering smell of pine from daichi’s cologne.

\---

the singular headlight reveals the outline of a person, standing in the middle of the road. instinctually, suga slams on the brakes and the car skids to a halt, sending the occupants lunging forward before they crash backwards against the seats.

daichi’s head whips around to face suga’s, his eyes widened with surprise. “what’s the matter? are you okay?”

suga slouches back into his seat. after a quick pulse check, “i’m fine, i’m just glad i didn’t hit them.”

“...hit who?”  
“come on dai, don’t mess with me right now.”

he chuckles dryly, but the frown on daichi’s face was the only thing he got in return.

“look, kou. there’s no one there.”

sure enough, when suga looks back up, the figure was no longer there. only darkness lay ahead.

he says nothing in reply.

“if you want, i could dr—”  
“no, daichi. i’m finishing this drive. i promised i would.”

the ex-captain sighs, understanding suga’s resolve. “...i know.”

the voices in the car fall silent once again as they journeyed on.

**[79 KM UNTIL DESTINATION]**

it was the morning they left the shelter of their old high school, about 5 months after the start of the apocalypse. the building wasn’t going to hold much longer, and they didn’t need all that space anymore… seeing as it was only the two of them now.

they trekked the meters all the way back to their shared home; luckily, they didn’t live too far from their old houses; suga remembered how daichi’s mother pestered them into staying nearby. their plan was to grab anything salvageable and leave for the countryside as soon as possible.

“we have to live for them.”

though daichi had never said this out loud, suga could practically read his mind. suga knew that the last thing he wanted was to let everyone’s sacrifices go to waste, no matter how hard it was to keep walking. it was their responsibility to carry the torch and protect the flame until there was nothing left to burn.

on the court, daichi said he was no protector. but in reality, self-sacrificing was second-nature. everything he did, every task he undertook, was dedicated to a cause greater than himself. and this failure to save those dear to him brought sleepless nights and long, moaning cries muffled under tear-soaked jackets. suga saw it all: the cracked shell, that exposed the fragility of the man.

but now things were different. they couldn’t afford to sacrifice themselves anymore. it wasn’t right, to just throw everything away after coming so far. they had to keep walking because there was no one else left to walk in their place.

the house was unrecognizable— heavily damaged, with a caving ceiling, but everything was intact enough to get by. fussing about the structural integrity of this building wasn’t going to fill their stomachs, heal their blistering ankles, or soothe their aching muscles. daichi went in first, due to suga’s insistence. a couple of minutes later, the silver-haired man burst through the door, singing, “daichi, i’m hoooome!”

daichi, who was digging through the pantry, poked his head out to laugh. it was a recreation of such a mundane sight—suga arriving after his long day of herding schoolchildren like sheep, daichi gathering the ingredients for the night’s dinner—but seeing each other smile genuinely for the first time in what felt like weeks invigorated them. it was a nice feeling. it almost felt like time had turned back for just a moment.

\---

suga’s eyes flutter in a haze. there’s a loud crashing noise ringing in his ears like lingering television static.

“hey. you’re overthinking again, aren’t you?” daichi laughs dryly. he gazes out the window and watches the light snowfall.

suga perks up, the static dissipating.

“it’s not like there’s anything else to do,” suga laughs too, but there's no humor in his tone.

**[21 KM UNTIL DESTINATION]**

a tiny tree car air freshener hangs from the rear view mirror, swaying back and forth like a pendulum. the faint scent of pine hangs in the air.

“hey.” suga turns his head, just to see daichi rousing from his slumber.

“yeah??” daichi mumbles groggily, one eye still closed.

“oh...nevermind. you can go back to sleep.”

“i’m up already. what did you want?” he says with a yawn in between.

“can we stop, for just a second?”  
“huh? yeah, of course. you’re the driver.”  
“we’ll keep moving in a second, just--”  
“kou, i already said it was fine. take your time.”

the car pulls off to the side a little, even though they haven’t seen another vehicle pass them throughout the entire ride.

for a moment, stillness fills the volume of the car to the brim. for a moment, it is just them, the only people left on earth, sitting in a raggedy, beat-up car, at dawn, in a post-apocalyptic sendai, not a single word exchanged, only the faint sound of breathing heard.

after those moments, suga leans back. inhales. takes his hands off the wheel.

they’re in the homestretch, it’s almost over, he’s almost done. 

daichi puts a hand on suga’s shoulder and nods.  


“i love you.”  
“love you too.”

**[0 KM UNTIL DESTINATION]**

the car parks along the side of the house, parallel to the road. suga rests his head on the steering wheel for a few elongated seconds, relieved that they’re safe but also drained from the tedious journey.

he takes those seconds to collect himself.

“we’re here, finally.”

suga announces this to an empty car. one glance to the passenger side revealed that. _oh. he must’ve left already._

he was hoping he could be the first one inside, but it looks like daichi beat him to it.

he shuts off the engine and opens the door. 

one step out of the car tells him that the snow is ankle-deep. clearly underdressed for the weather, he embraces the freezing temperatures anyway and heads straight for the house. he almost trips on the way there.

there it was.

there was the house.

reduced to black ash and rubble, the house that previously embodied everything he has ever wanted: a place to share with someone that loved him as unconditionally as he loved them. 

he remembers now, why he had wanted to come back.

beneath the debris and snow lays the man he had once loved. a man larger than Earth itself, one who could carry the world with the broadness of his shoulders, his hands. parts his fingers have traced over countless times, broken and withered. these… were the very hands he used to hold up to his lips to give “sweet-nothings” kisses on the backs of them. his eyes lingered to his face. one that smiled when suga came home. one that cried with him when they were at their lowest. one that had a honey-glazed glow whenever he told him that he loved him. suga could even hear it now. 

_i love you._

years ago, they had become the best of friends, volleyball captains, then eventually lovers. months ago, they had traveled together, survived together, kept each other alive for long enough. but in the end, he is merely human, and he is not made of earth. or rock. or roots. he is made of flesh, of bones, of blood. and so the world had to collapse on him eventually. it’s the cycle of life. the only thing that remained of him was the promise they uttered to each other. his voice rang at the back of his mind, pulling him into memory’s arms. 

_“promise you’ll live for me, the best you can.”_  
_“i’m going to come back, dai. after i’ve done everything, i’m going to come back. i want to see you again.”_  
_“i’ll wait for you, then.”_

suga can’t help but cry, but he does not weep for the lost and destroyed. he cries because he is home. it’s been a trip and a half through hell, and now he’s made it home. getting here was the only thing he has wanted for god knows how long, and with some blessing from the heavens he did it. he lays down next to the remains of the house, under the vermillion sky, with its hues of scarlet and orange bleeding into each other; and sinks slowly into the inches of snow beneath. his pale hand trembles as he reaches out—whether it is from the cold or from the bitter remembrance of what once was... not even he could tell.

in a hoarse whisper that only the dead could hear,

“dai…

i’m home.”

**Author's Note:**

> hey!! thank you for sticking around till the end! again this is my first real fic and i was really nervous to join jukebox … but i wanted to challenge myself and i hope you enjoyed nonetheless!
> 
> shoutout to vania in particular for talking abt daisuga dying that one time in my dms. you probably didn't know it but that was rly inspirational for my fic i appreciate that (and shoutout to the rest of the horsemen for hyping me up ily guys)
> 
> shoutout to gab for doing some of my final revisions for me ur an absolute g and i kiss u
> 
> looking at this now. realistically idk how they wouldve found enough gas to make it 200 km back home but just imagine i had a rly good excuse ok. and if you see time or tense discrepancies no you didnt
> 
> follow me on twt i have much more experience in art [@shemosphere](https://twitter.com/shemosphere) <3
> 
> if you want the fic playlist that i listened to over thirty times while writing this [here you go](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5nKQIkyP2TechQrIdjtpc3?si=5g2_DyhRTSOEopYZWGb-WA) (some of the lyrics don't match but it's the vibe ok)


End file.
